At our 2-year anniversary, as we take stock of where we’ve been, we are also looking toward the future and thinking about what we want The Spiral Goddess Collective to be. We have grown enough that we can begin to shape our offerings—especially our events, workshops, and projects—around the central tenants of embodiment, movement, connection, empowerment, and transformation.
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We want everything that we offer, from meditation to dance to yoga to events—everything that we put our time and our hearts, minds, and bodies into—the be centered around embodiment. Embodiment connects our mind, body, heart, and spirit. It allows us to feel and perceive with all of our senses. It requires us to pause, to slow down, to experience our whole body and whole being. It helps us to live more authentically.

In our culture, it is not easy to be in our bodies. So much in our lives keeps us disconnected from ourselves, separated from each other, and chasing myths. We live in our heads, and on our devices, sometimes forgetting that we even have a body, except when it inconveniences us, or when it is a body devalued and devoured by our systems and structures, or when we don’t have the resources or support to live fully in our bodies.

To be embodied is to live fully and freely and it is not easy. Like anything else—healing, learning, connecting—embodiment is a non-linear process. The embodied practices that we offer are somatic—they encourage us to embrace our wholeness as well as our interconnectedness. We focus on the process and the present moment, not the desired end result. We focus on how we feel, not how we look.

While any activity can be done mindfully, in embodied ways, with somatic approaches, what we offer are mind/body practices that help us to be more mindful, embodied, and somatic in everything we do. We offer a safe and supportive space, a beautiful space with a view—a sanctuary for our practice.

We encourage embodied, somatic movement because we all move too little. We sit and work. We sit and play. We sit and rest. We sit and we don’t move our bodies enough. And when we do move, we often do so in ways that punish our bodies. We want to encourage freedom of movement, joy in movement, pleasure in movement—movement for mind, body, and spirit. Move and Be Moved!

We encourage authentic connections to ourselves and to others. We spiral in to know ourselves better and we spiral out to connect with our community. Many of us are introverts. We come to SGC because it is a safe space to be ourselves and engage with others in a space that is held and curated for both introspection and interaction.

We empower people to replace old stories and old patterns, old ways of thinking and being, with new stories, new patterns, new ideas, new movements of the mind and body. We want to tap into our power to heal ourselves and to live more fully and more authentically. We want to remind ourselves that we are powerful beings in so many ways.

And we transform ourselves to transform the world. We want to embrace change, to roll with it, to find new opportunities to move and breathe and learn and grow.

When I opened SGC, I had a vision of a Collective. I knew if I built it, they would come. And many people who need what we offer have found us. We have positively impacted so many lives, including our own. At our September Radical Careworkers meeting, Kate was talking about how one of the things that she loves about the work she does for SGC is that she is able to give and receive. She is able to offer her curated movement and meditation practices, and she has been able to grow personally and professionally through the programs that she has attended and the mentoring she has received.
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This is exactly what I wanted for SGC to do and be. And as Kate was talking, I realized that this is exactly the benefit that I get as well. I have learned and grown so much from both the embodied movement experiences that I curate and facilitate as well as from the events that I attend at the SGC. We have so many talented curators and teachers and what we offer is, I think, unique in our community and maybe even beyond.

It is easy for me to give, but it is often nearly impossible for me to receive. I am working on that. At that same Radical Careworkers meeting, I angsted about the pressures of “owning” SGC, which comes with a lot of financial stress and obligations. I try not to let it get to me. I try to stay focused on the fact that SGC is my community service, my laboratory, and my art studio. Still, it is difficult to carry all the weight all of the time. In addition to managing the entire enterprise, I teach 4 to 5 times a week and I do not pay myself. All of the money I make from teaching goes directly back into the business.

I am fortunate to have support from SGC curators and teachers as well as the regular feedback and reinforcement from many of our community members who remind us that the SGC makes a difference in the lives of our Collective Community. So, thank you!

And in the spirit of keeping the doors open for another year (and growing into all we want to become!), we also thought it would be nice if we gave our Collective Community an opportunity to more directly support our mission and vision—an opportunity to give a little extra if you are able to. What you give need not be financial, though we certainly appreciate financial support!

Here are a few things you can do that don’t cost any money (and during our October celebration we will offer 20% off of any purchase if you do any of the following):
Post a review on Google Business telling people about what you love about SGC

Bring a friend. Their first class is free. You can even send them the promo code on your fitDEGREE profile to help us track the connections our community makes.

Make a commitment to share our Fb or Instagram posts for a week (or more!)

Tell your coworkers about what we offer or ask your workplace to support the well-being of their employees by opting into one of our new Professional Development Packages

Attend our 2-yr Anniversary Celebration on Saturday, October 12 from 4:00-6:00pm

If you have extra money to give, you can contribute to help supplement the many operating costs:
If you pay an extra $5 a month, you help us pay for a month’s worth of toilet paper

If you pay an extra $10 a month, you help us pay for ½ hour of cleaning

If you pay an extra $15 a month, you help us pay for 10% of the monthly cost for the fitDEGREE App

If you pay an extra $20 a month, you help us pay for 3 months of ginger chews

If you pay an extra $25 a month, you help us pay for a month of internet access in our space or a month’s access to Canva where we design our advertising and social media posts.
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We are so grateful for all that we receive through our work. We are grateful that we can give back so much to our community. We want to keep on giving and growing… and it’s good to receive your support as well! Just reach out or stop by if you have any questions about how you can give back or pay it forward.

As I take a moment to reflect on what we have accomplished at The Spiral Goddess Collective in the two years since we opened, I am overwhelmed. It’s always good to look back and take stock. Because there is so much that I want to do, it is easy for me to forget the magnitude and depth of what I have done. And what we have done together is even more powerful!

We have offered a wide variety of weekly classes, unique workshops, and dynamic events and we have solidified our mission and vision as a community center that offers trauma-informed yoga, dance, meditation, and embodied movement.*

Since we started using the fitDEGREE app, 314 people have attended our weekly classes and events.**

We have awarded approximately 25 SGCCF scholarships for 5 free weekly classes (a value of approx. $1800)

We have given approximately $1500 of sliding scale discounts on events since February

We have supported other community organizations and causes:
We have donated money to OUT Maine, The Together Place, HEAL (Health Equity Alliance), Downtown Bangor, Third Space/Bangor African Festival, Wabanaki Health Alliance, Tandem Mobility, and Robinson Ballet.

We have donated time and services to Partners for Peace, PACE alternative sentencing program, UMA-Bangor, Maine Women’s Lobby, Bangor Chamber of Commerce, UMaine CHAARG, UMaine Black Bear Mutual Aid Fund, MAPIL (Maine Association for Public Interest Law).

And all of this is only what my not-so-perfect record keeping reflects. Our weekly class schedule has grown and we are regularly reminded about the positive impact that we have made in people’s lives.

We are asking you to help us celebrate our 2-year anniversary through attendance at our special events on October 12th (Art + Transformation open house) and October 19th (Radical Careworkers with a special offering from artist Edner Fago and an opportunity for chakra-inspired, transformative art through embodied movement). We also have a variety of special deals and opportunities, with more exciting events coming in November!

​I appreciate all of the support from our community, and I hope that all of you will help us to not only keep the doors open, but to serve more of our community for years to come!***
 
*We will be sharing more information about our mission and vision over the month of October (and beyond). Did you know that our website is a rabbit hole of information about who we are and what we do? I update it as often as I can to reflect our growth and evolution.
**Did you know that you can use the fitDEGREE app to: communicate directly with our curators and teachers, purchase a class or event for a friend or family member, register for your favorite classes ahead of time?
***My second blog in this 3-part anniversary blog series has ideas on how you can help us to survive and flourish.

The Spiral Goddess Collective stands as a beacon of Radical Community, a space where diversity, inclusivity, and empowerment are found at the heart of everything we do. Rooted in feminist principles and the celebration of divine feminine qualities such as collaboration, compassion, empathy and flow, we aim to challenge oppressive structures and foster a community where all individuals can thrive authentically. Cultivating a radical community within this unique space involves intentional practices that uphold our core values and drive meaningful change for our minds, bodies, spirits, and the world around us.
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At the Spiral Goddess Collective, we embrace intersectional feminism, recognizing that wellness and healing deeply intersect with race, class, disability, sexuality, gender, and other aspects of identity. We offer something to our community that is rarely found in other places and spaces dedicated to fitness, wellness, dance, or yoga—a space that is inclusive of all bodies and identities, not just in word, but in practice. Our approach to yoga, movement, and community is queer—unconventional, radical, inclusive, trauma-informed, creative, and deeply rooted in connection.

Radical queerness is about more than identity—it’s a revolutionary approach to life that questions and subverts traditional norms and binaries. In the quest for authentic healing and personal growth, embracing radical queerness offers a powerful catalyst for transformation. Radical queerness goes beyond the surface-level acceptance of LGBTQ+ identities; it challenges normative assumptions, disrupts oppressive structures, and celebrates the full spectrum of human experience. By integrating radical queerness into our communities, we foster environments that are truly inclusive, dynamic, and just.

Radical inclusivity is the foundation of the Spiral Goddess Collective. It involves creating a space where all identities are honored and celebrated, and where diversity is seen as a source of strength rather than division. Cultivating radical inclusivity at the Spiral Goddess Collective involves a multifaceted approach that embraces all body sizes, gender identities, sexual orientations, abilities, and socioeconomic class levels. By fostering a space where all individuals are empowered to be their authentic selves and to work towards a more equitable world, we serve as role models for radical community building. Through our intentional practices and unwavering commitment to these core values, the Spiral Goddess Collective not only enriches the lives of its members but also contributes to the broader movement for social change.

Cultivating relationships and connection outside the arrangements that our current culture presents to us can be a radical act in and of itself. Here, we recognize and emphasize the importance of interconnectedness, recognizing that true community is built on radical acceptance, radical inclusivity, and the authentic celebration of diversity. We recognize that diversity is not just about representation; it's about cultivating a community where everyone has the opportunity to thrive and contribute to the collective well-being. We invite you to come as you are and to discover that you are so much more than you’ve been allowed to be. We invite you to start healing your wounds so that together, we can participate in healing the systems and structures that cause these wounds. Transformative healing happens form the inside out and the outside in. When we move our minds/bodies together, we are stronger—we are a collective of power and potential!

In addition to radically queer yoga, dance, meditation, and mind-body movement, we imagine our space as one of boundless possibility, where differences are not merely tolerated but cherished as vital components of a vibrant and dynamic community. In January, we initiated our Radical Careworkers Coven, bringing area healthcare practitioners, healers, and careworkers, together for networking and support. And here we are, co-creating CommuniTea Connections, embodying the essence of community building through the shared ritual of tea. Tea rituals, steeped in tradition and mindfulness, provide a space for individuals to engage in meaningful conversations, share personal stories, and build relationships across diverse backgrounds.  This initiative brings people together in a serene and welcoming environment, where the simple act of brewing and sharing tea becomes a powerful tool for fostering connection and understanding.

My personal hope is that opening space for these rituals and connections will help foster and  encourage connection, diversity, inclusivity, personal growth and empowerment. My hope is to provide a safe space, a brave space, to explore one’s identity, express oneself freely and authentically, and regularly reflect on progress so that together we can create vibrant, resilient, and enriched space where everyone feels valued and empowered. By creating these intentional gatherings, CommuniTea Connections promotes a sense of belonging and solidarity, transforming the communal tea experience into a cornerstone of vibrant, understanding, and radically inclusive communities.

Even though I am relatively successful, I can’t help but feel like I am bad at business. In October of 2022, I opened The Spiral Goddess Collective, a Center for Mind/Body Movement. I cringe when I am referred to as the owner. I want to jump out of my skin when someone calls me an entrepreneur. Both of those terms are accurate, but they don’t feel like a good fit. They make me feel dirty, manipulative, and like an imposter.
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I call the business of The Spiral Goddess Collective a not-for-profit because this too is an accurate term, even if it is not sanctioned by the world of business as such. My tax man instructed me that I have to make profit, otherwise the IRS will see my business as a hobby. But my definition of profit is different. I make profit so that I can give back to my community.
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My business is not-for-profit because everything that I earn goes back into the business. While I pay a portion of the money that comes in to the instructors and curators who teach classes and hold events, the money that comes in from the classes that I teach goes directly to business expenses (rent, internet, supplies, printing, software, etc) and my full-time job supplements the costs of operating The SGC. I don’t (yet?!) make money through my business, but we keep growing! Maybe someday I will make back my initial investments in this grand experiment, this dream, this community hub for embodiment and connection.

The Spiral Goddess Collective is a business, but it is also my community service and my activism. It is my laboratory and my art studio that complements my academic work as a Professor of Transdisciplinary Cultural Studies. It is where I put theory into practice. The classes I teach and the workshops and events I offer are a part of this, but providing a space for others to offer their classes, events, and workshops is another big part. And providing this space and all of our offerings to our community at Pay What You Can/Sliding Scale prices is the whole.

My university views my work at The SGC as a conflict of interest, and I have been trying to make the argument that this conflict is actually a benefit to the university, the community, and to our students. But the truth and reality of what The Spiral Goddess Collective is and what it does is not in alignment with policies written to attempt to limit greed, exploitation, and business as usual.
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My mother told me that I should not tell people that I am bad at business. Maybe it is not that I am bad at business as much as it is that I don’t like to play by the rules that most businesses play by—the rules set by capitalism and intertwined with other oppressive systems and structures.

And there are some business things I am pretty good at. In less than two years I have learned two different class management software systems. I’ve learned how to use a variety of other software programs and how to navigate a maze of aspects related to owning a business. I have built upon my skills, experience, and knowledge from my dual careers in academia and the world of fitness. I am highly organized and really good at making and managing schedules. I’m pretty good at website design and social media and program development. I’m good at communicating and valuing people. I can do a lot with very little and I am a multitasker in all things, but there are a lot of details to manage.

There are too many things that I want to do for the business, but time is never on my side. Thus, the biggest reason that I am bad at business is that I have a full-time job as a professor—the kind of job that has no boundaries and a million expectations (and is particularly dangerous for people-pleasing overachievers who tend to lack boundaries!). It is the kind of job that can never be left at work; it always follows me home.

My “real job” bleeds over into my work at The Spiral Goddess Collective, and it has threatened my health and well-being many times over the years. My job in academia is one of the reasons why I teach movement, dance, yoga, and fitness classes and preach self-care and embodied social justice. It is an attempt to find balance.
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In my work at The SGC, I’ve tried not to confuse my desire to provide access with the martyrdom that sometimes comes along with preaching Pay What You Can/Sliding Scale options and offering full and partial scholarships. I want to offer everything for free, but there are bills to pay and friends in the business have told me that people can’t wrap their heads around free. Free means that something has no value. Free means that they are unlikely to invest in themselves. Free means that I don’t value my own worth.

And what they tell me is evident in our culture: too many people want to buy into myths about weight loss. They want to be told that they can reach all of their impossible goals. They want to know how many calories they will burn; they want to see the results on their Fitbit or Apple watch. They want it all to be quick and easy. They want to punish themselves. They want to fit in and they want to stand out. They want superficial transformation—a body to envy. This is not what we are offering.

I want to have more faith in people. I want to think that there is a different way of doing fitness and business as usual.

And I think that we are beginning to see cultural shifts that will make what we offer at The Spiral Goddess Collective more valuable. I think that people are tired and need more rest and relaxation, deeper restoration, and support for their mind/body/spirit. I think people are disconnected—from themselves and from each other—and that they are looking for authentic connections and opportunities for embodiment. I think that people are searching for meaning and purpose and that they are looking for something different than fitness as usual and business as usual.
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For all of the struggles, my work at The Spiral Goddess Collective makes me happy. Teaching what I want to teach, the way I want to teach it, in line with my principles and values, and supporting other people’s teaching makes me happy. When I opened The SGC I envisioned it as a collective and it has become more and more of a collective every month. I have generous, supportive instructors and curators who often give their time, money, and energy as well. And we have grateful members of our collective (aka: clients, participants, customers) who love our space, our vision, our mission, and our offerings. I am grateful for all of the people who make The SGC what it is—a unique center for mind/body movement.

I want to believe that there are ways of doing business as not so usual, and I see the evidence of this possibility every day.

On Thursday, July 27, I am offering a JourneyDance class at the Wilson Center in Orono. The Wilson Center is “an independent, progressive religious and spiritual organization” that “aims to build community for spiritual exploration and multi-faith dialogue.” For this JourneyDance and potluck event I put together a special “Mindbodyspirit” playlist and have been thinking about the context of spirituality in JD and in my life and life’s work.

I.
I have never described myself as a spiritual person. I was raised Presbyterian, but religion never resonated with me. Church was a drag, except for the donuts. Sometimes I envy people who believe in God, who have an anchor to what I consider to be the unknown and the unknowable.

Sometimes I would imagine what it would be like to be able to say, “I’m not religious, but I am spiritual.” Sometimes I would joke that yoga was as close as I got to church; I taught most Sundays and it’s as close to a spiritual practice as I have ever gotten. Perhaps I would connect spirituality to my relationship to nature, mountains, the ocean—the vastness of the universe. A love of science fiction is, perhaps, a kind of spiritual practice? It wasn’t until I participated in JourneyDance that I began to participate in what I might describe as spiritual practices. And I began to see other aspects of my life’s work as spiritual.

Before JourneyDance, I took an Embodied Social Justice certificate program through The Embody Lab and was introduced to the work of Rev. angel Kyodo williams. If I was going to be religious, I would probably choose Buddhism, but all religions are too structured and too limiting for me. For a short time, I investigated Paganism, which resonated in many ways. And when I recently read a bit of Starhawk’s classic The Spiral Dance, I found that many of her descriptions of witchcraft—in history and in practice—resonate with the teaching I do in and out of academia.

But, nothing speaks to me as a whole, contained spiritual belief system. Like my interdisciplinary academic work, I take bits and pieces from a variety of sources and cobble them into something that resonates with me and remains flexible. This approach is not unlike Octavia Butler’s creation of Earthseed (which is now a “real religion”) in her Parable duology. Her character, Lauren Olamina, an empath raised in the strict religious practices of her Baptist father, collects truths from a variety of sources and leads her followers through dystopic landscapes as Shaper. My students have likened me to Olamina, but I would not be so arrogant as to make this comparison myself.

And yet, I am a “natural leader,” an empath, and a visionary and the power that I hold is not unlike what Olamina wields (collecting ideas, writing, taking care of people, providing opportunities for education) or what Starhawk describes as a “power that comes from within” and that “is never power over another.” Instead, it is a power that helps to grow the power of others and depends upon “personal integrity, courage, and wholeness” and “encourages healthy pride, not self-effacing anonymity; joy in one’s strength. Not shame and guilt.” This is the power—and the path—that JourneyDance has helped me to embrace more fully.

II.
Through The Embody Lab, I was also introduced to the work of Staci K. Haines and her book The Politics of Trauma. In addition to describing “the ever-expanding universe, the energies, beyond human, that we are living with,” she also explains spirituality as “a connection to something more vast, felt yet unknown.” Around the same time, I was introduced to the work of yoga therapist and psychologist, Gail Parker, who describes spirituality as “an ideal that lifts you beyond your everyday struggles and helps you clarify, reflect upon, and understand life from a deeper perspective, and to live more artfully.” All of these ideas about spirituality turn up effortlessly in my JD teaching, which is an art that I feel my way into.

 When Haines writes about spirituality, she is also writing about embodied transformation as “ways of being, acting, and relating [that] are aligned with what [we] most care about.” Gail Parker expands on this idea as she explains: “The spiritual dimension refers to our relationship to the beliefs, ideals, values, and principles that we live by; this dimension determines how we operate on the other dimensions [physical, mental/emotional, social] and how we make sense of the world.”

Before JD, I had largely made sense of the world intellectually. I would push away anything that felt too woo-woo. But my JourneyDance training came about through an unbelievable string of synchronicities that cannot be dismissed as mere coincidence. People of faith might explain my experience with other words, but I can only say that there was a spiritual dimension that I have continued to explore through movement, meditation, oracle cards, and an open mind to learning more about myself and my purpose—education, embodiment, and empowerment—and the path that I walk, or dance, through this life.

Gail Parker explains that “it is by connecting to this higher state of consciousness that you begin to reconnect to values that express your internal truth, allowing you to create meaning for yourself and make sense of things.” And this is the key to a spiritual life for me—this reconnection and the creations that have been birthed from my desire to “make sense of things.” The Spiral Goddess Collective is one of these creations and each JourneyDance playlist is a stepping stone on this path that has no destination, only process.

III.
This “Mindbodyspirit” playlist brings together some of my favorite songs and practices from other playlists and provides a variety of ways of considering the connections between mind, body, and spirit. The titles of the songs for the first few tracks speak for themselves: “For My Soul”; “Waking Up”; “Gold Flow”; and “My Mind” take us through a welcoming of our mindbodyspirit, connecting to our internal truths, to seeing the bigger picture and connections between the individual and the structural, feeling the full weight of our bodies on the earth, and appreciating the portal of our minds.

We start to connect to each other through Trevor Hall’s “2 Oceans” and Lakeside’s classic “Fantastic Voyage.” The former resonates with spiritual vibes and the connections that make us human regardless of which ocean we find ourselves by. The latter taps into the sci-fi quality of the fantastic, but also into the power of pleasure in our bodies and collective celebration in “the land of funk.”

We then turn to one of my favorite process song, Milkman’s “Controversy,” which layers The Beatles and Tupac, Eminem and Britney Spears, and other artists who invite controversy for a variety of reasons. We play with ways of embodying masculinity and femininity and exploring the spaces in between these culturally polarized opposites. Our bodies anchor us to these energies that our culture pits against each other and we break out of those constraints by employing mind/body connections and exploring a third space of possibility.

A couple of songs directly engage with more religious connotations of spirituality: “Praising You” and “Save our Soul.” The first takes Fatboy Slim’s classic and gives it a feminine party vibe. In the second, we tell our story to the dance floor through Lexxi Saal’s soulful exploration of the state of our individual and collective souls as we navigate the challenges of this world that we live in.

From here we turn to an extended process of climbing a mountain to a clearing where we find our favorite place (real or imagined) and meet our inner guide for a JourneyDance ritual of parts work exploration. Through this ritual we discover what we need to know in the moment, but also that we have a wealth of wisdom within us already and that we can access this inner wisdom whenever we want to.

In the last section of class we explore all of our senses and sensuality as we dance to Annie Lennox’s version of “I Put a Spell on You,” which brings us back to ourselves, reminding us of all of the ways that we avoid getting too close to the parts of ourselves that we fear, but that we belong to ourselves and deserve to love our whole selves, even if we have to use enchantments to find that self-love and self-acceptance.

And finally, we connect back to the power of nature with Lo Wolf’s “Be Like Water,” a repeating mantra that connects us to all of the ways that we can be like water as we flow around obstacles in our path, carve new possibilities, nourish ourselves and others, and expand and contract to meet the circumstances. We sink back into the earth and into ourselves, contemplating the ever-expanding universe through two instrumental pieces: “Writing Poems” and “My People Have Deep Roots.”

This is just a glance into the bigger picture and deeper meaning of this particular JourneyDance playlist. Each playlist is unique even as it follow the flow created by Toni Bergins. And each time we come to the dancefloor, the journey is unique to the moment we find ourselves in and the people we find ourselves with, even if the playlist is the same.

Part of the reason I opened this space was to offer something to our community that is rarely found in other places and spaces dedicated to fitness, wellness, dance, or yoga—a space that is inclusive of all bodies and identities not just in word, but in practice. I wanted to bring my particular approach to yoga and movement, which is queer—unconventional, radical, inclusive, trauma-informed, creative, and “deeply rooted in truth, love, and justice,” as Jacoby Ballard describes (and as I quote in part 1 of this blog). There are many ways to be queer, and one way is to challenge gender binaries and social and cultural norms of all kinds.

Many gyms draw strict gender lines with offerings for men and women, reinforcing stereotypes that weight rooms are for men and group fitness classes are for women. Locker rooms where you have to choose to identify as “man” or “woman” will likely feel unsafe if your appearance is gender non-conforming. Some yoga classes offer a certain pose variation “for men” or “for women” and reinforce binaries of gender. The music used in a lot of classes reinforces heterosexual narratives about love and romance and stereotypes about men and women (and boys and girls).

Further, many group fitness classes are populated by people who are thin and already “fit” and fat bodies are conditionally welcomed into that space if they want to lose weight, as if this is the only goal of moving one’s body. The messaging in and around group fitness is largely about losing weight—about changing your body to be more “fit” or “healthy,” which ultimately means more socially acceptable. But “fat” is not just a physical weight we carry; it is often related to trauma—the psychological weight we carry. And narrow cultural norms reinforce the psychological weight that queer people, and all socially unacceptable people, carry.

Before opening The SGC, I taught fitness classes for over a decade at a community non-profit where I did not feel comfortable being out (and I taught fitness classes elsewhere for many years before I was brave enough to consider myself queer). I was discouraged from including “political” messages in my classes and promotions for classes. I taught a program where I was required to use music that often had lyrics that I found to be offensive to women and to reinforce stereotypes related to race and sexuality. But it was deemed “clean,” and context was ignored. Still, being in my fat body, leading a class, was the least I could do to push back again one of the norms of fitness spaces. More than once a new participant walked right past me to talk to the thin woman they thought must be the instructor. Too often, we are unaware of the limited scripts we participate in on a daily basis and most gyms and fitness centers prefer not to have these societal corsets pointed out.

One of the worst examples from this past teaching gig is something that happens all the time in mainstream/corporate America. One day I walked in to the facility to witness a large, masculine person teetering around in high heels and “acting” like the female CEO because he had won the honor of “CEO for the day.” The staff filled the lobby as everyone laughed and cheered for this offensive display, which was probably considered to be a light, fun team-building activity. I felt extremely uncomfortable as I passed through to teach my class and imagined what it would be like to be trans and witness that display. I debated for weeks about whether I should say something to my supervisor or just let it go. I still regret that I let it go.

So, opening The Spiral Goddess Collective is also an opportunity for me to be more brave, more open, and more in line with my values. This is part of “the potential for queer identity,” what Mattilda Bernstein Sycamore describes as “the radical potential to choose one’s gender and one’s sexual and social identities, to embrace a radical outsider’s perspective, to create a culture on our terms, and to challenge everything that’s sickening about the dominant culture around us.” The Spiral Goddess Collective embraces a radical outsider’s perspective.

Despite a name that is feminine, and perhaps makes people wonder if men are allowed to attend classes and events at The SGC (the answer: of course they are and they do!), our space is pushing up against the boundaries of the norms of fitness spaces as well as the norms of social justice movements. The Spiral Goddess is not just a symbol for women—it is an archetype that informs what we birth into the world, how we use our energy, how we treat ourselves and each other, and how we connect our inner and outer worlds.

Feminine qualities and values like collaboration, compassion, empathy, nurturing, and flowing are seen as weaknesses. Women are expected to work out to get hard, but not too hard. To be thin, but still curvy. We compete against ourselves as much as the other women in the room. And, women and femme people of all genders, have been excluded, abused, and threatened in fitness spaces (and the larger culture), to say the least.
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Men are made to feel like they have to be stereotypically masculine (competitive, linear, logical, assertive, independent, controlling), which just adds to the problems of our patriarchal world and the mental health problems of men, women, and children and everyone outside of these gendered categories. Individuals are forced to choose one side of the gender binary or to push back as non-binary, both of which can lead to violence against ourselves and others.

At The SGC we embrace the radical, political meaning of queer and practice radical acceptance—we invite you to come as you are and to discover that you are so much more than you’ve been allowed to be. We invite you to start healing your wounds so that we might also heal the systems and structures that cause these wounds. Transformative healing happens form the inside out and the outside in. When we move our minds/bodies together, we are stronger—we are a collective of power and potential!